Self-Represented in Family Court
We discuss how to use strategy in Family Court to get the results you want. A family law professional with twenty years of experience in the field will share with you what really matters in Family Court.
Whether you are going through divorce or custody, if you are representing yourself you need to know the tactics that will end the torment you have been enduring up until this point.
We will share tips, tricks, techniques, and everything else that your lawyer will never divulge. If you have been getting disappointment from lawyers, the judge, or the overall process, tune in to get help on plotting your next move.
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Self-Represented in Family Court
Season 3. Ep 5. Reframing: It IS What You Said AND HOW You Said It
Ever walked out of a courtroom thinking, “What just happened in there?”
You told the truth. You stayed calm. You presented your evidence — and somehow, the judge still didn’t get it.
If that sounds like you, this episode is your reality check — and your roadmap out.
In this episode, Tracey Bee, breaks down one of her most important strategies: reframing.
Because in family court, it’s not just what you say — it’s how you say it, how you think about it, and how you present it that determines whether the judge actually listens (and believes) you.
💡 What You’ll Learn:
- Why family court doesn’t care about your emotions — and what it does care about
- How to use reframing to shift your narrative and credibility in front of a judge
- The difference between reaction and strategy — and how one wins cases
- How “victim language” and emotional framing can hurt your credibility
- Real-life examples of reframes that turn frustration into persuasion
- Why professionals in court mirror your tone, language, and logic
- How to prepare mentally before your next hearing
Episode timestamps
(00:00) Intro
(01:41) Today’s Topic: Reframing
(02:34) Why “Truth + Calm” Still Fails in Court
(03:34) Emotions, Trauma & Hypersensitivity
(04:09) Courts Don’t Weigh Emotions—Logic Reigns
(06:27) Custody Timeline: Why You’re Not “Done” Yet
(08:45) Your Narrative Sets the Tone (“Best Interest” Myth)
(10:07) Reaction vs. Strategy
(11:25) The Underdog Reality: Courtroom Dynamics
(15:30) Unhelpful Frames to Drop (Victim, Blame, Defensive)
(18:16) Reframe #1: “Judge Doesn’t Care About Truth” → Tailor Your Story
(19:22) Reframe #2: “They’re Turning the Kids Against Me” → Describe Changes Factually
(20:08) Reframe #3: “Court Ignores My Evidence” → Pick Persuasive Exhibits
(20:39) Practice & Role-Play Offers
(22:14) Reframe #4: “My Lawyer Didn’t Fight” → Fix the Gaps
(23:33) Reframe #5: “The System Is Unfair” → Accept, Adapt, Act
(26:38) Outro
Family Court can be traumatic! And trying to handle your case on your own can be even more catastrophic. There are twists & turns at every stage that you need to be aware of and to prepare for. Having a solid Gameplan and someone to help you execute it effectively can make all the difference in the Universe (not just the world.) We know all about the bias, corruption, and dysfunction being handed out by the system. We just want you to have a fighting chance by leveling the playing field.
Need help in handling your Family Court case on your own?
We have services that are specifically geared toward helping self-represented litigants like you understand the common mistakes that lead to the most disappointing outcomes.
To find out more about our services and to stay informed of our FREE workshops by joining our email & visit us at www.TheDivorceSolutionist.com.